7.7

I'll probably have to imagine myself today to have been like a "Giselle" character, a girl who died of a broken heart.

First, I woke up from a nightmare. My nervous breakdown continued until the morning. Hence, I cried on my desk before going on with my usual morning routine. After crying, I got dressed and did whatever I had to do for the day.

The latter part of the morning was spent in church. After church, I drove to another church to have a Bible study session while my family and went to SM Aura. They ate ramen without me. :(

I caught up with them at SM Aura to have "tea time." My family would typically look like a very studious bunch on any table. While in any coffee shop or restaurant people only sat down and dined, we kids always had school work with us, and my parents had their books/newspapers/financial documents/contracts. I have no idea why we always brought those things outside with us.

In the afternoon I sent Ho Jae a message before I proceeded with studying. It was compulsory. Ho Jae is a person I talk to about God and the Bible because he always, always understands. I've not yet met anyone who is as patient, understanding, and disciplined as he. He's so disciplined that talking to him makes me feel weak and inadequate.

I also tell him about men I dislike/liked and about my problems involving them. He makes sure I don't stalk [hot] guys' walls because it leads to infatuation which leads to self-destruction. If I do, I owe him coffee for every one stalk. I guess, even if we never talked about not stalking his wall or his brother's wall, those count as well.

Second point in relation to feeling miserable today: he sent me the longest, guilt-laden message ever. He feels too much. I accidentally called his brother "hot" and he didn't like it. Oops, forgot that they were identical. I probably owe him a cup now.

Well, besides my morning hysteria, I didn't really feel all that miserable today at all.

After the drama, I killed the internet and shut my phone off to retract from the rest of the Facebook world. I studied henceforth.

My day ended boringly.